Puppet Master: Axis Termination (2018)

Director: Charles Band

Notable Cast: Paul Logan, Jean Louise O’Sullivan, Tania Fox, Lilou Vos, Kyle Devero, Tonya Kay, Kevin Scott Allen, Rob Vardaro, Nick Vernon, Alynxia America

It is hard to believe that Charles Band’s Puppet Master Franchise has made it to Part 11 (not including the spin-off tie-in flick Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys). This means it is officially the longest running horror franchise of all time… that is if you don’t count the Friday the 13th spin-off film Freddy vs. Jason and the Friday the 13th remake as well as the dreaded Witchcraft series which is more softcore porn than horror. Is the Puppet Master franchise worthy of such a coveted record? That would be a big HELL NO from me. Sure, the franchise was fun the beginning, but it has been mostly downhill since Part 5 with it hitting rock bottom with the clip-show insult eighth entry hiding under the title Puppet Master: The Legacy. It has been an ever slow uphill battle from that tar pit since. Hell, even my last review for Puppet Master X was positively negative, if that makes any sense. It was still bad, but it was a step in the right direction of trying desperately to grasp any of the old nostalgic fun of the Full Moon brand of yesteryear. Sadly, the same cannot be said about Puppet Master: Axis Termination, the supposed end to the “axis” story arc that began but the ninth film, as this is easily the worst since the… shutter… clip show entry.

Trancers: City of Lost Angels (1988/2013)

TRANCERS: CITY OF LOST ANGELS

Aka "Trancers 1.5", "Pulse Pounders"

I was hell bent to hunt this down ever since my old college roommate discovered that Charles Band made a mini “Trancers” sequel in 1988 as part of an anthology film called “Pulse Pounders”. I soon found out this quest would be impossible when I read that the original rough negative of the film had been lost due to the collapse of Empire Pictures. When news hit that Band had found a rough cut of the film on an old VHS tape my interest perked up and the release of “The Evil Clergyman” (The first part of the “Pulse Pounders” anthology) only wetted my appetite to see this ‘lost’ “Trancers” sequel. Finally the wait is over as the 24 minute “Trancer” sequel segment from “Pulse Pounders” has made its way to DVD, re-christened under the title “Trancers: City of Lost Angels”  (though I prefer the humorous working title “Trancers 1.5”) for all “Trancers” fans to lap up.

Jack Deth (Tim Thomerson) is still hanging out in 1988 Los Angeles, clinging on to a pipe dream detective career while trying to save his rocky relationship with Lena (Helen Hunt).  Just when it can’t get any worse a Trancer he locked up from the future escapes and somehow manages to ‘jump down the line’ in order to take his arch nemesis out. Can Deth’s boss McNulty (Art Le Fluer returning) help save Jack and the entire space-time continuum in only 24 minutes?

The idea of making a sequel  to one of his popular films as part of an anthology was a really strange idea and Band even mentions that “at the time it seemed like a good idea” in one of the documentaries on the disc. This is a shame as the plot to this “Trancers” sequel feels tremendously condensed in order to fit into its short segment in the anthology. Everything just flies by making this seem like an episode of a Jack Deth television series and it only made me crave more, wishing Band had made a full length film instead of a condensed short for an anthology.

Even with its condensed plot there is still plenty of Jack Deth magic to be had as this feels and looks exactly like the original film and the plot fits nicely in between parts I and II. All of the lovable surviving characters return which is sure to bring a smile to any “Trancers” fans face. Fans need to be remember that the version Band released on DVD  is from a rough edit taken from a VHS source so it can look a little rough to High Def fanatics but Charles Band’s crew at Full Moon did their best to clean it up, adding a score and title sequence (why can't they go to this effort for the other films in the series?!). It just makes me wonder if the “Pulse Pounders” anthology got released at the time if there would have ever been other sequels to “Trancers”?  Well one should not dwell on hypothetical questions so don’t be a squid, slick your hair back, light up your cigarette and add this lovable long lost, albeit too short, sequel into your “Trancers” collection.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Dreamaniac (1986)

DREAMANIAC

There is a terrible stigma carried with the phrase “direct-to-video” today which is usually synonymous with cheap and all around shitty filmmaking. This of course is not always the case but happens to be true more often than not. Back in the mid-80s however the term “direct-to-video” was worn as a badge of honor, with DTV films proudly proclaiming on their video box artwork that they were “too gory for the silver screen” and other bullshit statements of the sort. This of course was far from the truth as they were no gorier than their theatrical counterparts and, much like today’s oversaturated DTV film market, were just as shitty and cheap.

With the tagline “You don’t have to go to Elm Street to have a nightmare” it’s obvious this forgettable feature is a rip-off of Wes Craven’s ground-breaking film "A Nightmare on Elm Street". We have a heavy metal musician that dabbles in Satanism (though I question him being a ‘heavy metal’ musician we are introduced to him wearing a Def Leppard shirt… come on man! Display some SLAYER!). He summons a succubus who haunts his dreams, which is according to a character in the film, is a female demon that fucks men and then kills them but not always in that order. The succubus shows up at a party later and one-by-one starts killing all the teenagers, virgins and sluts alike.

“Dreamaniac” opens with what is possibly the slowest and most boring opening credits ever no doubt drug out to get the film over the 75 minute mark. After the dreadfully slow opening credits slasher fans are then graced with a dreadfully slow film with only a few bloody kills to break-up the tedium.  Everything else is absolutely the lowest common-denominator of filmmaking with cheapjack lighting and directing and porn-level acting. All this is wrapped up with a cop-out ending that that will ensure to make the viewer face palm their head so hard they might die of a skull fracture.

“Dreamaniac” was made at the height of the home video craze and it served its purpose at the time by giving slasher film fanatics a little more blood in their diet.  Today, however, there is absolutely nothing about the film to make it worth digging up.  This is not a “lost” gem by any means as the tedious pacing overall cheap filmmaking makes many of today’s direct-to-video slasher’s look like gold in comparison. I can only recommend this film to collectors of slashers of the golden age otherwise one is better off re-watching “Nightmare on Elm Street 5” instead. Seriously, “Nightmare 5” is better than this! The back of the box artwork even goes as far to claim "makes Freddy look like a bargain basement boogeyman". In the words of my brother "leave it to a bargain basement knock off to make that claim".

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Oblivion (1994)

OBLIVION

No one would ever claim Full Moon films to be ‘original’ but nearly two decades before the big Hollywood production “Cowboys & Aliens” Charles Band and crew were first to have other worldly beings shooting it out in the dusty plains of the wild west. Hell the tagline was even “In the Year 3031… It’s Cowboys and Aliens”. Though Band’s artistic vision was much larger than his wallet could provide (Unlike the newer Hollywood film), the final results is one of the most entertaining films to emerge from the Full Moon factory in its classic era of the early 90s.

A reptilian alien known as ‘Red Eye’ slinks into the wild west town of Oblivion gunning down the sheriff in an unfair duel. While Red Eye and his motley crew of misfits (my personal favorite being Lash… a sexy little thing that gets her kicks from whipping innocent folk) plummet the town into anarchy, the sheriff’s disenchanted son and his new native friend make their way to Oblivion to clean up the scum.

Despite the budget the film is loaded with an impressive ‘who’s who’ cast of character actors: Meg Foster (“They Live”, “Masters of the Universe”) and her hypnotic eyes as a cyborgnetic deputy, George Takei (Sulu from “Star Trek”) as a drunk doctor, Julie Newmar (Catwoman in the original “Batman” series) as a prostitute, Carel Struycken (Lurch of the “Adams Family” films) as an undertaker, Andrew Divoff (“Wishmaster”) as the despicable villain and Isaac Hayes (“Escape from New York”, “Truck Turner”) in small role as a banker. It may not be a ‘Harrison Ford’ caliber cast but all considering it’s impressive and it’s fun to play ‘spot the actor’.

The plot is tired western cliché material about vengeance but the addition of the unique set designs (street lights with fans is especially odd) and curious alien compositions breathe life into the tired plot devices. The highlight for me was the utilization of cool David Allen stop motion effects for “night scorps”, nasty giant scorpions that are eager to to drag victims into the night for disembowelment. Damn I miss the grand work of Mr. Allen.

“Oblivion” is pure B-movie entertainment that only the likes of Charles Band could deliver. Like usual his ambitions are more than his budget could allow for but that’s part of the charm of his productions. There’s enough interesting visuals and characters to entertain both adults and older children alike (there are a few graphic sequences, one involving a poison frog attack and the other a night scorpion dismemberment) despite its cliché script. This makes it easy to see why “Oblivion” has gained a small cult following over the years and it really marked the end of the classic era of Full Moon productions as soon after Paramount Pictures and Full Moon parted ways leaving its sequel “Backlash: Oblivion 2” (which “Oblivion” was filmed back-to-back with) to wither on rental shelves in… what else… oblivion.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Puppet Master X: Axis Rising (2012)

PUPPET MASTER X: AXIS RISING

The “Puppet Master” franchise has put my cult movie loving emotions through the ringer over the past 25 years. From childhood nostalgia for the first few entries, absolute contempt peaking with the stock footage heavy eighth entry “Puppet Master: The Legacy” to utter disappointment from the supposed ‘return to form’ last entry “Puppet Master: Axis of Evil”. By the time this tenth entry (eleventh including the spin-off “Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys”) got announced my emotions were drained and I was left with complete apathy for the series. I seriously just didn’t give two shits anymore and the last thing I cared to ever watch was “Puppet Master 10”. After a year curiosity got the best of me and I decided to give it a shot and though still a mere shadow of the classic old entries, it’s still better than the last four sequels and for this franchise that’s saying a lot.

Taking place directly after the events of “Puppet Master: Axis of Evil” (and still a prequel to the very first "Puppet Master"), our hero young man with a limp and his girlfriend try to convince the American government that the Nazis are experimenting with living puppets in order to use their secrets to resurrect dead soldiers for battle. The government agrees and sends an aging G.I to aid in their mission but first they must defeat a small army of new killer Nazi puppets (Bombshell – a female Nazi with a rack to die for, Blitzkrieg – a tank with head, Weremacht – a werewolf SS officer and Kamikaze – a poltically incorrect Japanese suicide bomber.

One thing I have to commend this sequel on is the title which utilizes the Roman numeral “X” for “10” to great effect. It’s about damn time this series got back to using numbers, especially not pronouncing the Roman numeral “X” as the letter “X” like the makers of “Jason X” as they thought it sounded more “hip”. The poster artwork is also a nice return as its actual ARTWORK and not just a passable photoshop job. I digress as the title and poster artwork is cool… but what about the film? Well… it’s bad but not as bad as most of Full Moon’s catalogue is today. Thanks to Charles Band himself filling the director’s chair makes this sequel comes off better than the previous ‘return to form’ sequel “Puppet Master: Axis of Evil”. He does what he can to give the film some polish, and it works during the opening alley sequence, but the films ultra-low budget still shows through.

Much like the last few sequels the low budget hit’s hardest with the puppets themselves, which look like stiff, poorly made versions of their classic designs (not to mention the noticeable lack of the trademark stop motion that made the first entries so much damn fun.) The locations are also limited to seemingly only two locations and acting, especially our two young heroes, is especially lacking.

Even with all these limitations due to the budget, this is the closest Band and crew has ever come to capturing the magic of the original run of the franchise. For that I give Full Moon credit. I’ve just finally came to the acceptance that Full Moon films are never going to be as good as their classic era. This new mindset and Band’s veteran B-movie directing abilities finally gracing the franchise he helped create had me enjoying “Puppet Master X” better than I thought I would. Yes, finally a newer sequel that didn’t make me hopping mad! For that it makes this land mark tenth entry (officially tieing it with the original run of the “Friday the 13th franchise) worth at least a watch for fans of campy B-horror movies.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Killjoy 3 (2010)

KILLJOY 3

AKA "Killjoy's Revenge"

In 2009 Full Moon president Charles Band announced that that they would be making three sequels that would mark the companies triumphant return to their loveable B-movie roots. With the company floundering for years and being a fan of their output during their glory age of the early 90s, I instantly became curious what the sequels would be. The unveiling showed that they would be "Puppet Master IX", "Demonic Toys 2" and.... "Killjoy 3"?! I can completely understand a sequel to "Puppet Master" and "Demonic Toys" as they are two of the companies most popular films but why the hell would they make another sequel to fucking "Killjoy"? The first two "Killjoy" films were made during the era when Full Moon Entertainment was at absolute rock bottom and they ended up so flippin' bad that I don't know a single soul that enjoyed a second of them. So why make a sequel to a series of films that absolutely no one liked? Well to my astonishment not only was "Killjoy 3" better than the first to shit entries, but I also enjoyed it more than "Demonic Toys 2" and "Puppet Master IX". Seriously did hell freeze over or something?!

"Kiljoy 3" opens with a professor visiting a voodoo priest in order to raise our demonic clown Killjoy for revenge. He skips out on the deal, pissing Killjoy off and Killjoy somehow (reasons unknown) ships an evil mirror to the professors house and ends up tricking some college kids into coming in the mirror so Killjoy can toy with them in his demonic realm in order to steal their souls.

Killjoy the long horn... does this entry take place in Texas?

The first thing about this sequel that blows the other films away is the obvious improved production values. Sure the film is still ultra low budget but this time it actually looks like a film, as opposed to a home movie or a student production.  The second is the acting is a complete stairway above the non-acting of the previous two, enhancing the enjoyment immensely. The third is the addition of sidekicks to the Killjoy character, which includes Batty Boop (a sexy clown babe that walks around in the nude), Punchy the clown and Freakshow. They add some flavor to the film, allowing for more interesting toying with the main characters.

Dinner is served...

The main attraction is the return of Trent Haaga as Killjoy, who was the ONLY thing worthwhile in the second entry.  He seems to having ball playing the Freddy Krueger inspired knock-off and killing off our disposable young adults in is demonic realm, which is equivalent to Freddy's dream realm.  Other than our demonic team, the rest of the characters are typical fodder for the slaughter and are just as paper thin than any of the numerous meat puppets in the Elm Street sequels.

Extra! Extra! Read all about it, Killjoy 3 is actually watchable!

Considering the dire reputation of the first two "Killjoy" films, I should never have enjoyed "Killjoy 3" but alas I did! Not only did it make me forget the shitness of the first two films with its higher production values and tighter script, but it's the most enjoyable Full Moon feature I've seen in years. Sure it has the typical limitations and flaws of low budget cinema and slasher films in general but at least this one entertains, which is more than I can say about those OTHER TWO FILMS! Pretend those don't exist and skip directly to "Killjoy 3". Make believe there's no "3" in the title and consider it the first "Killjoy" film... you'll be glad you did.

 Written By Eric Reifschneider

Killjoy 2: Deliverance from Evil (2002)

KILLJOY 2: DELIVERANCE FROM EVIL

AKA "Killjoy 2"

Hands down the LAST film in the universe  that deserved a sequel is fucking "Killjoy" and I doubt it had enough of a following to warrant one but I guess when a films budget feels like it was only $10 it is guaranteed to make money in the end. Well two years later "Killjoy 2", an even lower budgeted sequel, infected video store shelves and guess what... it's basically as bad as the shit original with one aspect I dug a little more to warrant it a half a blood drop higher in it's dismal rating.

Some inner city troubled youths are taken by their parole officers into the middle of the country to do some therapeutic bull crap. Of course they break down in a non-cell service area (here's a hint, don't take dangerous youths to areas with no cell service!) so one of cops has to hike to a nearby house where one of the fuck-ups gets his ass shot off for trespassing. Needing help they plead with some voodoo babe but not before one of the girls calls upon the demonic clown Killjoy (Why? Still not quite sure) who predictably decides to go on a rampage.

Casting call... no ability to act necessary

It's hard to believe but this sequel even ad a LOWER budget than the original, by about a 100 grand! Even with a much lower budget (which is hard to imagine) the style of this film is a hair better thanks to a director making this look like an actual film (well, maybe more like a film student production) as opposed to a home movie.  They are able to do this by shooting most of the films plot in the woods (a staple of all low budget cinema) and by having Killjoy appear in the 'real' world as opposed to victims being sucked into his demonic realm (hence no shitty computer effects... YAY!). The acting on the other hand is just as shitty as the first and the plot is just as toilet paper thin.

An outhouse... fitting considering that is no doubt where the film was written

What I like about this sequel better (hence the higher rating) is the recasting of Killjoy with actor Trent Haaga. This guy throws all he has into the role making it energetic and he even got me to snicker at a few of  his bad "Freddy Kruger" comedic  one-liners. Even a snicker is better than tying a noose around my neck, which I did while watching the original. Sadly the Killjoy charater doesn't show up until over halfway through the film and when he does, the character feels wedged into a film in which he doesn't belong.

Any chance one of these jars has sulfuric acid to throw on the writers?

I 'enjoyed' "Killjoy 2" ('enjoy' may not the proper term) thanks to the new actor playing the title character, but this is still a shit film in the bottom of the barrel of brown trout. The acting, script and plot holes makes this damn near unwatchable and just when I was about to shut the damn thing off, Trent Haaga as Killjoy appeared to making it barely viewable to the very end. Did they make a "Killjoy 3"? Of course they fucking did but at least it only gets better from here.

 Written By Eric Reifschneider

Want to purchase the "Killjoy" 3-film set? Do so at the link below!

Killjoy (2000)

KILLJOY

I feel completely violated at the moment. Why you ask? Because a no-talent ass clown named Killjoy just had his way with me ensuring I'm going to have to be sitting on a doughnut pillow for the rest of the week in order to heal. I just don't understand why all these clownsploitation horror films of last decade are so damn bad. Clowns are scary right? Well 9.9 times out of ten it doesn't translate into a scary movie with "Killjoy" being a complete incompetent 'joy killer' instead.

Taking place in inner black gang territory in an unnamed city, "Killjoy" opens with a 'nerdy' high school student getting the shit kicked out of him for hitting on a gang leaders bitch. This of course gets his ass killed but not before he brings his demonic clown toy "Killjoy" to life  to get revenge on all the thugs. The problem is Killjoy doesn't stop with his killers, but continues to murder anyone else involved in the nerds life.

Pennywise he is not...

The clown character of "Killjoy" is nothing but a lame, carbon copy of Freddy Krueger with a dose of Pennywise from Stephen King's "It" as he tries to be scary but all his mega lame comedic one liners causes the doofus to fall flat on his big ass red nose (the worst being the line "That's how you bust caps motherfucker" as he spits out bullets to kill a thug).  The character of Killjoy will NEVER go down in the annals of history among the likes of Freddy and Jason and for that I thank the horror gods every day.

Much like the audience, this character gets beaten to near death due to the films sheer ineptitude

The look of the film is nothing more than a small step up from a homemade movie. Not "Secrets of the Clown" bad, but close and if you have had the displeasure of seeing that hunk of shit then that is a scary comparison indeed.  Everything about this film is bottom of the barrel (of monkeys?) as the non-existent production values, sophomoric acting, mundane script writing, laughable computer effects and incompetent directing ensures the film will be a total bore to the senses. And seriously how did B-movie icon Charles Band get suckered into executive producing such a shit-fest?

Black Magic + Demonic Clown Doll = Shitty Movie

"Killjoy" is nothing more than a less-than-routine would-be slasher in which someone thought up by quickly writing up an outline on a cocktail napkin while getting drunk with some buddies at a strip club. I'd say it's by-the-numbers but even that's too much 'praise' for such a hunk of worthless crap. Absolutely no thought went into writing such a banal 'horror' film and the killer clown shtick has been done death, and much better. It's hard to imagine that such a lifeless horror film would end up mutating into a franchise, with two sequels and a third in the works. Seriously, what the fuck?!

 Written By Eric Reifschneider

Bloodlust: Subspecies III (1994) - 2/5

Why, oh why is the second of two back-to-back made sequels always the worst of the two?! Seriously, name me one instance where the second is better (and no, the "Lord of the Rings" trilogy doesn't count as they were all filmed at once). "Matrix Revolutions" was worse than "Matrix Revelations", "Trancers 5" is worse than "Trancers 4" and of course "Subspecies III" is worse than "Subspecies II". There just wasn't enough plot to pad this entry out so what we get is a dull "Beauty and the Beast" clone with blood suckers.

Opening right after the second film, our 'mummy' resurrects our drooling blood fiend Radu and now he miraculously decides that he loves our crying heroin Michelle Morgan (Denice Duff again) despite trying to kill her off brutally for a majority of "Subspecies II". Michelle's sister and her boyfriend continue, unsuccessfully, to rescue her even with the help of a dimwitted inspector and a mercenary CIA operative.

I praised director Ted Nicolaou in my review for "Subspecies II" for tightening up the pace but here he fumbles the ball as the film meanders along with it's tragic 'love' story, and I use the term 'love' in the loosest form possible. He attempts to make a tragic "Beauty in the Beast" clone with vampires yet how can a love story bloom when our heroin despises the vampire beast so much. I mean this fucker brutally killed all here friends and even attempted to kill here so no love is going to bloom EVER!

Because the plot doesn't have anywhere to go our heroin Michelle mostly stands around crying AGAIN while Radu attempts to teach his crush how to thrive as a vampire. He even starts to feel sorry for the atrocities he committed in the previous films... which I call bullshit! The only part of the film that got me involved is the introduction of a peculiar CIA operative who is a gung-ho mercenary complete with machine guns to take the blood suckers on, which just makes it more hilarious when he is quickly done in with a flying knife.

Like most back-to-back made sequels there just wasn't enough plot to pad out another film. Unlike "Subspecies II", the plot here is slow and plodding with a long title and flashback sequence in order to pad it out to a feature film length. The production values are on par with the last film hence they are great by Full Moon standards but overall there isn't enough going on in this sequel to warrant it a 'must see'. Though it would have been fitting to stop here to round out a trilogy, Full Moon unwisely decided to make one more sequel but I advise stopping here.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Bloodstone: Subspecies II (1993) - 2.5/5

"Subspecies II" was part of an experiment Full Moon Entertainment conducted in which they made back-to-back sequels to their most successful franchises ("Subspecies", "Puppet Master" and "Trancers") and I've stated in other reviews that I DESPISE when production companies take this route. However I do have to hand it to Full Moon as they did craft some pretty entertaining sequels with this process (sans "Trancers 4" & "5") that actually puts high budget studios to shame that also practice this back-to-back sequel making technique (cough, cough "Matrix" and "Pirates of the Caribbean"). "Subspecies II" not only ends up being one of Full Moon's better sequels, but it actually matches the original with its low budget vampire sucking goodness.

Picking up right after the first film ended, we open with our ghoulish vampire Radu (Anders Hove returning) being resurrected by our pointless mini demons known as the subspecies (that somehow serve as the title of the series). Radu begins with killing his metrosexual brother in whilst sleeping (which means they couldn't get the actor back so they conveniently kill him off). Before he can kill the newly transformed Michelle, the sun rises so she awakes, steals the 'bloodstone' (which looks completely different) so know he must chase our virginal vampire down with the aid of his mummified hag mother.

This sequel outdoes it's guilty pleasure predecessor in the plot department as the pacing is much quicker. This surprised the shit out of me considering this was shot congruently with "Subspecies III" and with a single plot line expanding two films I expected far more padding. One aspect that the film fairs worse in is the dialogue department as it is far more hokey and silly. Director Ted Nicolaou does have a keen eye for style as the film has a nice polished look about it despite being made for the direct-to-video department. Nicolaou's use of shadows are also admirable and makes the film captivating from a technical standpoint.

The main problem for me is the main character of Michelle as she is far more wishy-washy. Her character in the first film (played by Laura Tate) was a strong, determined women. Here the character is just a needy, emotional mess that spends most of the film sobbing and crying. Her character also ends up being reactionary protagonist as she does nothing to move the plot along herself, only reacting to actions on the screen created by the antagonist character of Radu. Seriously Radu ends up being more of a main character than our 'heroin', if she would qualify as that.

The continuity as expected is complete bullcrap. Not only is our character of Michelle act completely different, she now has LONG hair even though the film takes place within mere moments of the original. The bloodstone itself has also gotten a complete makeover, though it does look far more lavish than the cracker jack toy of the original film. Seriously there's enough continuity errors here to make one's head explode.

A plethora of new characters are added into the "Subspecies" universe (perhaps 'universe' is too grandiose a term to describe such a silly low budget franchise) including but not limited to a our 'heroines' professor (where was he in the first film?), her sister (played by William Shatner's daughter... the horror!) and her preverbal love interest Kevin Spirtas, who looks like he just walked off the set of a soap opera. The new character that takes the blood pie is Mummy, Radu's hideous mother. Yes this character is a wee silly but her dysfunctional relationship with her son does provide for a few unintentional laughs.

Despite its obvious low budget short comings, "Subspecies II", compared to the original, is one of the more stronger sequels I've seen as it matches the original. Though it may be weaker in some angles (dialogue), director Ted Nicolaou makes up for it in other aspects (pacing). Overall this is a very satisfying sequel and one of the overall strongest films that the Full Moon factory pumped out in its early heyday. Can they keep it up in "Bloodlust: Subspecies III"? Well it's the second of back-to-back sequels so I'll let you draw your own conclusions.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Breeders (1986) - 1/5

"Breeders" is Tim Kincaid's second of three direct-to-video (a new trend at the time) of horror/sci fi hybrid films he directed for producer Charles Band's Wizard Video line (though Band did decide to give "Breeders" a very limited theatrical release). Out of all three (also including "Robot Holocaust" and "Mutant Hunt") this is the most tasteless, vulgar and the downright repulsive. Then again a horror 'monster rape' film with a title like "Breeders" one can't expect a film with any sort of class or respectability.

Virgin women are a small commodity in New York City to begin with but they become even more rare with a slimy underground space creature decides to procreate it's race by mating with New York's most coveted citizens. Now it's up to a dim-witted cop too young to grow facial hair and an over-made up doctor to kill the creature before it's offspring can cause the end of the human race.

What "Breeders" is as an extremely cheap knock-off in the questionable 'monster rape' subgenre of films that is desperately trying to mimic the success of "Humanoids of the Deep", made by Charles Band's more respectable partner in crime Roger Corman. Unlike that film which had a competent director and suitable actors, "Breeders" is just shit filmmaking all around.

The 'actors' (a term I like to use loosely) are just above porn level which should be no surprise since the director got his start in the genre. His banal directing also reflects his questionable background in filmmaking as his none-existent style focuses largely on female skin... which tries to be titillating but it just comes off as creepy and unpleasant when sandwiched between violent and disgusting rape sequences.

The casting is also odd as Tim Kincaid no doubt cast young women based on beauty and not if they fit the description as a virgin. One snorts cocaine, one dances nude in a photography studio, etc. Drug use and openness to nudity is all elements of quote, un-quote 'virgins'. Trust me, these girls have been around the block.

It's not just the acting and directing, but the monster suit, writing and even the sound quality is absolute rock bottom. Some of the dialogue is hard to make out thanks to the cheap sound recording that causes a hiss whenever someone speaks. Then again hissing is more pleasant listen to than compared to some of the crap dialogue. The monster suit also nothing more than a cheap rubber costume with glowing bug eyes covered with slim (I will admit that some of the gore effects are impressive and ghastly).

Tim Kincaid's writing is also porn level as there are plot holes big enough that this alien can't even get his cock into. Seriously how is this alien able to take the form of normal everyday people? What's the point of all this work when it just breaks out of their bodies in a mess of gore and blood when it has proven again and again that it rapes women without having to go to this extra trouble. It just seems to me like an excuse to load the film up with some gore.

"Breeders" was a trying film experience. It could have had some B-movie chuckles with its horrid filmmaking if it weren't for the offensive subject matter, which comes to a head in the climax when all our women swim around in a vat of what looks like alien semen.... barf. "Humanoids from the Deep" had respectable qualities... "Breeders" does not and fails to entertain even on a bad film grade scale. It's amazing that a film of this nature got re-released on video and DVD by a respectable company such as MGM and even inspired a loose remake in 1997 under the same title.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Mutant Hunt (1987) - 1/5

In the mid-80s home video revolutionized how people saw movies. Along with the home video market soon came idea of making films that would be made-for-video without the luxury of a theatrical release. Though producer Charles Band was busy making theatrical films with his Empire Pictures production company, he was at the head of the pack producing cheap pieces of direct-to-video junk for his Wizard Video outlet. With marketing gimmicks such as "too gory for the silver screen" printed on their eye-catching box artwork, Band suckered in horror and cult movie buffs to see these trash pictures that had no chance of living up to the glorious paintings that adorned the cover. "Mutant Hunt" is one of these releases that's artwork attracted my attention as a child that didn't live up to my trash loving expectations.

In the near future, a psychotic madman injects three cyborgs with a drug that causes them to be psycho sexual killing machines that mutate at an incredible rate and become ten times stronger than a normal human. Now a mercenary, which I like to refer to a cheap-jack "Blade Runner", must stop 'em before they brutally rape and kill the entire region.

With a title like "Mutant Hunt" one can't expect art. The acting is just above porn level, the sets are non-existent, the music is lifted from "Breeders" and Tim Kincaid's directing is again uninspired. Hell the plot even leaves too many doors open such as why the hell does our villain inject these cyborgs with a mutation psycho drug? His intentions is unbelievable. The one highlight is the practical special effects which includes some gore and tops out when a cyborg starts ripping his face apart. Does it live up to the marketing gimmick "too gory for the silver screen"? Not by a long shot but the effects at least keeps the film trucking along.

Not that I was expecting anything spectacular with a title like "Mutant Hunt", but for a film that not only has 'mutants', but 'mutant cyborgs' this should have been a lot more entertaining than it is. The formula for a great trash classic just doesn't compute thanks to the atrocious acting and bland direction making "Mutant Hunt" far below the loveable flaws of Charlie Band's theatrical efforts at the time. You think that Tim Kincaid would have learned a thing or two about making enjoyable bad movies after helming both "Robot Holocaust" and "Breeders" prior to this but nada.

Still "Mutant Hunt" has it's small, very small legion of fans and Charlie Band finally finagled the rights to the film away from MGM and recently released it on DVD. Don't get your hopes up though as this isn't comparable to the "stellar" DVD release MGM gave to Kincaid's previous direct-to-video trash venture "Breeders". That release was transferred from original film elements. What you get with "Mutant Hunt" is an old VHS transfer. Watchable but still on the blurry side. Still it's better than hunting down an over-priced worn-out VHS ex-rental.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Demonic Toys 2 (2010) - 1.5/5

In an attempt to reclaim their former glory after years and years of pumping out pure crap, Full Moon Pictures decided to produce sequels to two of their biggest hits "Puppet Master" and "Demonic Toys". The first sequel was "Puppet Master: Axis of Evil", an extremely disappointing sequel that proved that Full Moon was still a shadow of their former selves. The second sequel was "Demonic Toys 2" (despite two crossover films made previously with "Dollman vs. the Demonic Toys" and "Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys"). "Demonic Toys 2" ended up hair better than the new "Puppet Master" sequel but still proves Full Moon has a LONG way to go.

A collector of rarities shows up at an old Roman castle in order to collect an ancient toy unearthed by an archeologist. Of course he brings along a few demonic toys he picked up and an ancient evil brings the toys to life and possess the body of a psychic midget.

The continuity to the first "Demonic Toys" films is shaky at best (a character from the film "Hideous" even shows up). How did this collector get his hands on the toys from the warehouse in the original? It's never explained. Also not all the toys return so die hard fans will be disappointed that only Baby Oppsy and the demonic jack-in-the-box make an appearance but they might dig their new "Bride of Chucky" sewn-up appearance.

The production values are as low as they get, which isn't all that surprising. Director/writer William Butler does what he can but the film is still loaded with cheap-jack CGI effects and blood. The setting in a Roman Castle is no doubt due to budgetary reasons as it would be cost effective to film in producer Charles Band's personal property.

The plot is connect-the-dots loaded with the most cliché characters one can puke up onto a screenplay. Super smart, sexy archeologist, handsome love interest, creepy midget, and bitchy rich cunt all make their appearance and all the unlikeable ones predictably die off.

"Demonic Toys 2" was a valiant effort but it wasn't worth the 18 year wait after the guilty pleasure original. The cheap, digital look, bad CGI effects, bland plot and cliché characters makes this not near as fun. On the other hand it's far better than most of the shit Full Moon has been churning out for the past number of years.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Puppet Master: Axis Of Evil - 1/5

Has the Puppet Master franchise really reached the big number "10"? Despite Full Moon president Charles Band considering it only the ninth entry (more on that in other "Puppet Master" film reviews), it is technically the tenth, count 'em, tenth film in the franchise. It boggles my mind that the franchise has lasted over 20 years and this many entries. It's beat out horror heavy weight franchises like "Halloween" and "Nightmare on Elm Street" (not including remakes) and is on the coattails for beating out "Friday the 13th" and even the dreaded "Witchcraft" series. I will admit that's quite a feat for a franchise considering we are in a time when most films are being remade as opposed to sequelized. For that I give the "Puppet Master" franchise respect. The bad part is that this monumental tenth entry isn't much better than the last four entries and if you've suffered through those films as I have, then you know that's a really dismal statement.

This tenth entry, like many of the last films, decides to take the prequel route... well for the most part. The plot wraps itself around the pre-credits sequence in the original "Puppet Master". If your reading this review then it's safe to assume you've at least seen the original film so you know that our "puppet master" Andre Toulon committed suicide after hiding his puppets in the wall due to Nazi agents knocking on his door. Cue in young crippled male lead that stumbles by the door after Toulon commits suicide. Now the the film becomes a "sequel" to the original's pre-title sequence (confused yet?) as he goes in the room, somehow manages to find his hidden puppet trunk in the wall, and of course predictably opens it, learns the secret to make the puppets move, and then uses them to go after some Nazi spies in China.

I was skeptical when news hit that Charles Band was making another sequel into his "Puppet Master" franchise. I mean the last four entries sucked balls so I was not looking forward to it. I became opened minded once I viewed the trailer to the film as the production values looked better than the last handful of sequels but the trailer wasn't enough to make me plop down hard earned cash to add the film to my collection. Thanks to my brother renting the film and letting me watch it, I am extremely glad I didn't waste money actually purchasing the damn thing!

What's good about this sequel? Not much but the trailer was right, the production values are better than the last few sequels. Just because the values are better doesn't make the production values great. The sets are relatively poor and the movie looks like it was filmed with a low quality digital camera. Another good thing is that the puppets aren't computer generated (like many sequences in the recent "Demonic Toys 2") but without the stop motion magic of David Allan (who died in the late 90's) we are still left with stiff moving rod puppets. It was also clever how the filmmakers incorporated the pre-title sequence from the original film but in doing so they left some glaring plot holes (like the franchise didn't have enough as it is!). If our young cripple found Toulon's puppet trunk and took it to China to fight Nazi spies then how the hell did the villain in the first film find the trunk in the wall of the hotel? Also the film introduces a new puppet in the form of a ninja.... another puppet that appears in a prequel and amazingly doesn't show up later in the "Puppet Master" timeline.

"Puppet Master: Axis of Evil" suffers most from producer Charles Band cutting far too many corners. To save money he shot it in China for pennies. Due to this he hires shit actors and even gives the directing chair again to David DeCoteau. Sure he graced us with the decent third entry in the franchise but he was also responsible for two of the worst ("Curse of the Puppet Master" and "Retro Puppet Master") so he obviously can't be trusted to always deliver. He again fails....not as miserably like the afore mentioned films but damn close.

"Puppet Master: Axis of Evil" is not the return to the glory days that many fans were hoping for. The plot is boring and dull, the acting is dreadful, the sets are poor, and the directing is uninspired. What's sad is it seems that Full Moon really tried hard with this film and they still fell on their face. It's due time to close the lid on this puppet trunk once and for all and retire these puppets to the fire wood pile. Full Moon lost their zest years ago and this failed attempt to recapture that glory further proves they never will.

Bonus Rant: I hated how the title sequence read "Charles Band's Puppet Master: Axis of Evil." David Schmoeller, director of the original "Puppet Master", had a falling out with producer Charles Band and later stated in an interview that Band, unlike B-movie master Roger Corman, always took the credit of the films and never gave any to the directors. This arrogant title sequence further proves Schmoeller's statement.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Dollman Vs. The Demonic Toys - 1/5

After the end credits to Full Moon's Bad Channels, we were given a sequence of Dollman walking to Pahoota (the town in Bad Channels) to hook up with Bunny, a girl shrunk down to 13 inches by an alien. After that short sequence, the screen promised further adventures of Dollman but no-one knew it would be a crossover film which would include three different film series! Yes, Dollman vs. the Demonic toys isn't just a sequel to Dollman and Demonic Toys, but Bad Channels as well! This sounds like it would be a fantastic time but I got my hopes up and this crossover came out being a cheap cash-in that barely runs over an hour long.

Well like in the post end credits sequence in Bad Channels, Dollman arrives in Pahoota to hook up with shrunken Nurse Ginger. Right away there is a BLARRING continuity error. At the end of Bad Channels, the girl Bunny was the one left 13 inches tall and nurse Ginger was grown back to normal size. WHOOPS!!! My guess is that the actress refused to return so Full Moon "conveniently" rewrote the script to have Nurse Ginger still being 13 inches tall hoping viewers would just forget that little fact. WRONG! Well Dollman and Ginger hook up, shag, and then are approached by a cop (Tracy Scoogins, returning from Demonic Toys) to have them help here destroy some toys from hell. Always in the mood for action, Dollman agrees so he and his girlfriend go out on a hunt. The result isn't near as fun as it could have been.

This film feels like it was cooked up in a matter of minutes and to top it off, only about half of it (a half hour out of its measly hour long running time) is new footage. The remaining film is all flashback footage from Dollman, Demonic Toys and Bad Channels. WHAT! Full Moon you cheap cocks! I've already seen those movies so I don't need to rewatch them!

The film feels considerably cheaper than all three films it's a sequel to and the part that takes a beating is the special effects as when Dollman battles the Demonic Toys, it's obviously guys in suits making the toys run around. I did dig the new demonic toy which is a G.I. Joe like solder with bug eyes. He really gave Dollman a run for his money.

The film does have a few moments (the line "pop goes the weasel" is one of them) but it's not enough to save this rushed, clobbered together film. It could have been a monumental project for Full Moon but as usual Charles Band decides to cut corners resulting in a film that's a disappointment to the hard core fans. Sadly this film killed any chance of further adventures of Dollman but the Demonic Toys would return in another crossover film (Puppet Master vs. Demonic Toys) and a direct sequel (Demonic Toys 2).

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Dollman - 2.5/5

Producer Charles Band is sure good at coming up with really interesting ideas that sadly don't have a budget to properly back them up. Dollman falls into this category as the concept is really bad ass but the budget restrains the film from reaching its full potential. That however still doesn't strip it from becoming fun B-science fiction drivel!

Meet Brick Bardo (Tim Thomerson), a badass burnt out cop prone to violence on a far away world. He begins by saving a bunch of fat women in a laundry mat from a thug, gets fired by his superiors and then gets kidnapped by his arch nemesis who just happens to be a floating head (you see, Bardo blew away various body parts in previous encounters). He blows the hell out of the floating head's goons and then takes off chasing him in space ships. Both their ships hit some weird space disturbance and they are thrown across the galaxy where they land on Earth (the Bronx no less), a planet where Bardo only happens to be 13 inches tall! On Earth Bardo saves a struggling mother from some goons and our villainous head gets taken in by some sadistic thugs (lead by future Freddy Kueger actor Jackie Earle Haley). Now we can look forward to some serious bloodshed by these little guys!

The film is literally split in to two separate parts: Pre-Earth arrival and post-Earth arrival and to be honest the pre-Earth arrival is the best part... and he isn't even 13 inches tall yet! This sequence with Bardo on his home world is dark, atmospheric and loaded with machoism and violence. I had a ball! The film actually takes a little of a nose dive once he arrives on earth as the film just isn't as interesting from a visual aspect, despite the novelty of having our character being only 13 inches tall.

Director Albert Pyun is one of the best known directors for making schlock films. I either love or hate this guy as he can make some entertaining as hell B-movies or some that are downright unwatchable. Dollman thankfully is one of his better efforts. Hell I might go as far and say that Dollman might very well be his best film (though it would be a battle with "The Sword and the Sorcerer" and "Mean Guns" ). He actually does an adequate job here and loads the first part with a great dark atmosphere. Pyun impressed me with this release.

As for the cast how could you go wrong with casting Tim Thomerson as Dollman. Dollman really is the exact same character as Jack Deth from the Trancer series so that means he's a loveable asshole. Great one-liners and tough as hell. Jackie Earle Haley is also wonderful as our head goon. I always felt that he was an actor that never got the respect he deserved but thankfully audiences are coming around today with his wonderful portrayals in both Watchmen and the Nightmare on Elm Street remake.

The special effects take the blunt of the budget restraints as it is very obvious on more than one occasion that dollman is a "doll" in a toy spaceship. Even with the budget restraints Pyun does his best to get around the obstacles.

Dollman is an extremely fun B-movie with enough extreme violence, kick ass one-liners, machoism, and a cool storyline to keep any B-movie lover entertained. Dollman is definitely one of the highlights out of Full Moon Entertainment's classic era. A sequel did follow in the cross-over film Dollman vs. the Demonic Toys but that film wouldn't come near the likability of this cult classic.

Written By Eric Reifschneider

Arcade - 1/5

In the early 90's, movies incorporating 3-D virtual reality video games into their plot was a fad that thankfully didn't last too long. The most popular was the big budget dud The Lawnmower Man but on a much smaller scale there were such films as Evolver and of course Full Moon's Arcade. All I have to say is if 3-D effects are going to be the main attraction of your film, you better make sure they are good!

The script written future heavy weight Hollywood writer David S. Goyer is very simple. It's about a new Virtual Reality game that's getting a test run at a small arcade. After trying it out, a handful of teens are given a portable take home version, however the game's artificial intelligence grows and it ends up making some of the teens drool and then disappear. Two of our teens figure what's happening and decide to shut the game down at the source... by playing it.

The plot is insanely predicable and director Albert Pyun seems at odds directing a film that doesn't take place in a bleak future or include cyborgs. Overall the film felt very kiddish which is strange for Full Moon as they should have produced this under their family friendly sister company Moonbeam Entertainment. It just lacks in every department and it failed to deliver any of the cheesy Full Moon goodness I expect in their B-movie outings. No violence, no cool characters, no funny on-liners, and piss poor directing. To top it off the computer generated effects for the video game are insanely awful! I understand this came out in 1993 but these graphics even sucked back in those days.

It might just be me but it seems every movie about a virtual reality video game sucks and it still boggles my mind that Arcade is one of Full Moon's most popular films. It must be the nostalgia for viewers that saw the film as a kid because this is easily one of my least favorite's from the company out of their "classic" era of films. What's ironic is that I own 2, count 'em 2 copies of this turd on DVD. Why do I own 2? Well I got one in a box set entitled "Full Moon Classics Volume One" and another in a box set entitled "Full Moon Features: The Archive Collection." I can't sell one of them because that would ruin the box set... so there they sit, both of 'em, doomed to collect dust on my DVD shelf for the rest of my short life.

Written By Eric Reifschneider